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I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

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I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby miltiades » Tue Aug 27, 2013 8:09 pm

My name is Zor, I come from another planet far more advanced than the earth planet far more civilized. My Planet is called Zhloranus and has a population of approximately 100 billion, we have men women and children like you have but we do not expire as you do, we rotate so as not to overpopulate our planet and exhaust our food supplies which are not dissimilar to yours here on earth.We do also rather enjoy a good drink, red wine mostly , WE KNOW of its intense beneficial effects on our ever lasting health. only its not for health that we consume wine but for other reasons, namely its benefit to our insatiable and ever present libido.

We do not have any form of religion on our planet, our forefathers did however a few million years ago but is all forgotten now and laid to rest.

We have a political system that serves our Planet well, a governing system not dissimilar to Democracy although ours is democratic dicta tum m which basically means that those elected have full executive powers for 10 years, then they rest and .. rotate.

Why was I sent to earth you may ask. Well a new party has just been elected and embarked upon a study of Religion in various planets including Earth. My role was to report back on the effects of religion on Planet Earth.

Where else to commence my study but the very essence of the birth of Earths largest religions. so here I'm in Syria having already visited Jerusalem and Palestine, Israel too. Not impressed.
In Syria I witnessed death and savagery, the stench of dead bodies lying in the streets, men women and children young and old leaving their last breaths of dusty streets in the heat of your summer.

I do not make any notes as you Earthlings would do since our brains have developed a photographic memory that can be accessed me mere thought.
My next visit was due to take place in nearby nations,Afghanistan , Lybia, Somalia and others before making my way to the Western world starting from the inimitable Stroumbi The Great on the sunshine island of Kypros.

Will continue>>>
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby CBBB » Tue Aug 27, 2013 8:32 pm

How much red wine did you have today?
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby Schnauzer » Tue Aug 27, 2013 8:39 pm

miltiades wrote:My name is Zor, I come from another planet far more advanced than the earth planet far more civilized. My Planet is called Zhloranus


How does one pronounce the name of your planet, is it 'SoreAnus' ?. :wink:
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby miltiades » Tue Aug 27, 2013 8:58 pm

My political and wise masters from my Platet gave me strict instructions not to antagonize earthlings but to befriend them find out what makes them religious. After all my journey to earth was dictated by the need to discover the secrets and benefits of religion and why earthlings believe in the mythology that we long ago ditched, of a creator. To disobey commands given by my superiors would entail an immediate rotation, not welcomed at my very young age of 67 earth years old, approximately 18 years of equivalent life on my planet!

By the way, age of consent on my home planet is 16 years old and not as some plonkerarsehole mentioned earlier as being 31 in
Kypros.

Someone asked how much red wine I drunk today, my dear earthling, its like asking me how much air I breathed today!!
By the way, on my planet we do not breath incessantly as you do, once an earth year is enough, but we do partake regularly in other physical needs, wine and sex for instance !
T be continued >>>
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby GreekIslandGirl » Tue Aug 27, 2013 9:24 pm

Seems that overdosing on Viagra can cause too much blood to leave the brain ...
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby miltiades » Tue Aug 27, 2013 9:51 pm

GreekIslandGirl wrote:Seems that overdosing on Viagra can cause too much blood to leave the brain ...

to a humans life.
On my planet we have no need for remedial intrusions to our physical behaviour, genetically programmed to respond at a millionth of a second to any worthwhile desire. A bit like switching the light on, just a flick of a switch, instantaneous activation of our most inner and acute desires.

However I must not greatly deviate from the task given to me, in that I have to discover the benefits derived on earth by the earthlings fascination of a creator. Incessant praying, incessant killings, hatred,wars after wars, praising their false gods as they kill and maim, as they put a permanent end, unlike our rotational rest, o a humans life.

This is, the M.E, after all, where it all started from, the birthplace of earths largest religions, this is where the poisonous and destructive religious philosophy metastasized and spread its poisonous cells to the four corners of earth.

We study you, we pity you, and I have seen enough, I'm going back to my peaceful everlasting life recommending that we need religion like a poke up our arses.
Amin.
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby Schnauzer » Tue Aug 27, 2013 10:26 pm

Do you have 'Bearded Traffic Wardens' on your planet. ? :lol:
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby miltiades » Wed Aug 28, 2013 3:24 am

No Sir, we do not have traffic wardens on my planet, we have no cars, no need for such dated mode of transport, ours is far more advanced integrally inherent in us all. Neither do we have have beards, another unsightly sight I witnessed in the M.E, I was under the impression that earthlings had advanced since the dark ages, but to see almost everyone sporting whiskers and women covered up was enough to make me think that maybe I had been sent back in time !!
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby denizaksulu » Thu Aug 29, 2013 11:01 pm

miltiades wrote:My name is Zor, I come from another planet far more advanced than the earth planet far more civilized. My Planet is called Zhloranus and has a population of approximately 100 billion, we have men women and children like you have but we do not expire as you do, we rotate so as not to overpopulate our planet and exhaust our food supplies which are not dissimilar to yours here on earth.We do also rather enjoy a good drink, red wine mostly , WE KNOW of its intense beneficial effects on our ever lasting health. only its not for health that we consume wine but for other reasons, namely its benefit to our insatiable and ever present libido.

We do not have any form of religion on our planet, our forefathers did however a few million years ago but is all forgotten now and laid to rest.

We have a political system that serves our Planet well, a governing system not dissimilar to Democracy although ours is democratic dicta tum m which basically means that those elected have full executive powers for 10 years, then they rest and .. rotate.

Why was I sent to earth you may ask. Well a new party has just been elected and embarked upon a study of Religion in various planets including Earth. My role was to report back on the effects of religion on Planet Earth.

Where else to commence my study but the very essence of the birth of Earths largest religions. so here I'm in Syria having already visited Jerusalem and Palestine, Israel too. Not impressed.
In Syria I witnessed death and savagery, the stench of dead bodies lying in the streets, men women and children young and old leaving their last breaths of dusty streets in the heat of your summer.

I do not make any notes as you Earthlings would do since our brains have developed a photographic memory that can be accessed me mere thought.
My next visit was due to take place in nearby nations,Afghanistan , Lybia, Somalia and others before making my way to the Western world starting from the inimitable Stroumbi The Great on the sunshine island of Kypros.

Will continue>>>

Bappou Krassi on the go. Lol

Hi my dear friend.
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Re: I CAME, I SAW, I'M GOING BACK !

Postby bill cobbett » Fri Aug 30, 2013 1:49 am

denizaksulu wrote:
miltiades wrote:My name is Zor, I come from another planet far more advanced than the earth planet far more civilized. My Planet is called Zhloranus and has a population of approximately 100 billion, we have men women and children like you have but we do not expire as you do, we rotate so as not to overpopulate our planet and exhaust our food supplies which are not dissimilar to yours here on earth.We do also rather enjoy a good drink, red wine mostly , WE KNOW of its intense beneficial effects on our ever lasting health. only its not for health that we consume wine but for other reasons, namely its benefit to our insatiable and ever present libido.

We do not have any form of religion on our planet, our forefathers did however a few million years ago but is all forgotten now and laid to rest.

We have a political system that serves our Planet well, a governing system not dissimilar to Democracy although ours is democratic dicta tum m which basically means that those elected have full executive powers for 10 years, then they rest and .. rotate.

Why was I sent to earth you may ask. Well a new party has just been elected and embarked upon a study of Religion in various planets including Earth. My role was to report back on the effects of religion on Planet Earth.

Where else to commence my study but the very essence of the birth of Earths largest religions. so here I'm in Syria having already visited Jerusalem and Palestine, Israel too. Not impressed.
In Syria I witnessed death and savagery, the stench of dead bodies lying in the streets, men women and children young and old leaving their last breaths of dusty streets in the heat of your summer.

I do not make any notes as you Earthlings would do since our brains have developed a photographic memory that can be accessed me mere thought.
My next visit was due to take place in nearby nations,Afghanistan , Lybia, Somalia and others before making my way to the Western world starting from the inimitable Stroumbi The Great on the sunshine island of Kypros.

Will continue>>>

Bappou Krassi on the go. Lol

Hi my dear friend.


... remind us please D... are you still a Bearded One...???
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