Cyprus-Forum.com

[bigfatlondonboy]

personally i dont think its right having children outside of marriage but ut seems to be the norm in england at the mo...

[Debbie]

Babies born outside marriage --- OK or not OK -- are you referring to common-law relationships or teenage pregnacy?

[michalis5354]

Why does anyone need to get married to have a baby? Marriage is a concept invented by the Church I guess and religion?

[Kira27967]

My only problem with children being born out of wedlock, is that it is so easy for families to grow with numerous "new parents"... ie, someone I know has 4 children and among them, 3 different fathers. The first 2 children don't know their own fathers. Who is to say that those absent fathers haven't created other children somewhere, and that the original children may not grow to find themselves becoming romantically involved with their own siblings?????? The thought becomes rather frightening.

A friend had one child by her first boyfriend, then he left, she met someone else, had 3 children by him, then he upped and left and had another child by another woman. I could go on all day with such stories.

For my own part, I had 3 children by my first husband, 2 of which were born before we married, (none by my second husband I might add), and my first husband went on to have 2 more by his second wife. It is made all too easy these days for families to become "extended" in the wrong way.

For or against babies outside of marriage???? No, not necessarily. It's not the having them that worries me, it is the having them with multiple partners that is REALLY the issue.

[Debbie]

little bastards

Now let's take a moment to ponder the comment "little bastards"

Here in Canada there unfortunately is still a very high rate of teenage pregnacies.

Many pregnancies are terminated as soon as the teen receives the word she is pregnant.

Others try to raise their baby at the cost of not being able to finish their own education and ultimately not being able to provide a solid foundation for their child.

Very few have the foresight to recognize the challenges of being a single parent and place their children up for adoption.

I happen to be one of the very lucky people who have been fortunate enough to adopt a child ..... so retired2northcyprus --- little bastard -- NO, love of my life --- WITHOUT A DOUBT

Children born outside of marriage inherently face larger challenges whether it be effectively coping with overly large extended families or coming to grips with the reasons a birth parent opted to place them up for adoption -- never ming the day-to-day hell of just being a child.

[littlemiss]

Well when i fell prgnant this year my parents and my partners parents insisted we got married, in their generation it wasnt the done thing to have a child before marriage. I cant say at first i was happy with the idea i love my partner very much but i didnt want him to marry me just for the child it had to be cos he wanted to spend his life with me. Anyway i wanted my romantic proposal. .................... We got married 2 months later LOL i never get my own way! Now i think about it im glad we are married for our baby its a secure family unit that is more likely to be worked at than walked away from. I think too many ppl who have children unmarried split up cos its easyier than working it out or at least trying this = all the half brothers and sisters, dealing with mums new boyfriend or dads new boyfriend lol!
Dont have the kid unless you are either planning to get married or are married he/she/it will need to feel secure.

[sadik]

Why does anyone need to get married to have a baby? Marriage is a concept invented by the Church I guess and religion?

I used to think that way. But now I believe marriage provides stability in a relationship which is important for the psychological development of children. I cannot think of any advantages of having a baby without getting married.

[Sotos]

Marriage is useless unless there are children involved. Without marriage children are less secure. On the other hand with the high rate of divorces today marriage is probably a waste of time. If people stop to love each other no contract will stop them from splitting up.

[andri_cy]

Do you think that if people stop loving each other that they should stay together for the sake of their children? Believe it or not, children understand, and speaking from personal experience I will tell you that if the parents dont get along and they dont love each other, the kids themselves are praying for them to end it because they get tired of the tension.

[Debbie]

Do you think that if people stop loving each other that they should stay together for the sake of their children? Believe it or not, children understand, and speaking from personal experience I will tell you that if the parents dont get along and they dont love each other, the kids themselves are praying for them to end it because they get tired of the tension.

Completely agree with you --- I was fortunate to come from a family where mom and dad loved and respected each other very much, but I have several friends who come from angry, bitter families and they always felt guilty they they were the only reason their parents stayed together and lived a life of misery and hell. Way too much guilt for any child to have to cope with.