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offensive jokes

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offensive jokes

Postby apc2010 » Mon Apr 12, 2010 3:09 am

looking for the most offensive or bad taste joke
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Postby bill cobbett » Mon Apr 12, 2010 3:40 am

My feeble effort .... A CY Joke .....


Big Mak, Colonel Greevarse and Rough Donktosh walk in to a bar .....

The barman goes .... "Is this a joke?"
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Postby apc2010 » Mon Apr 12, 2010 3:48 am

want more offensive please
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Postby dinos » Tue Apr 13, 2010 4:43 am

Q: How can you tell that your roommate is gay?
A: His d!ck tastes like sh!t.
--

A family are driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen. Embarrassed, and to spare her young daughter's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry; that was an insect." To which, her daughter replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that."
--

An elementary school teacher, a lawyer, a Catholic priest and three young boys are on a plane with only three parachutes. Engines explode, plane starts going down.

The teacher says, 'Save the children!'

The lawyer yells, 'FUCK THE CHILDREN!'

The Catholic priest looks around and whispers, 'Is there time?'

--

"Honest to god, I worked at an abortion clinic and someone locked their keys in their car. Hilarity ensued when we actually found a coat hanger in the medical suite for them."
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A woman successfully gives birth after several hours of labor. The doctor takes the baby and leaves the room to perform some tests. Several minutes later, the doctor returns with the baby in his arms and then suddenly begins to punch it, kick it, throw it about the room and slam it against an adjacent wall. The woman screams, "OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY BABY?!" To which the doctor replies, "April Fool's! It was already dead!"
--

The little rascals were in class and the teacher was giving them a vocabulary lesson. The teacher said, "Alfalfa, use the word love in a sentence".
Alfalfa replies, "I love Darla".

The teacher said, "Good...now Spanky your word is respect".

Spanky replies, "I respect the way Alfalfa loves Darla".

The teacher said, "Very good! Now Buckweat its your turn, your word is Dictate".

Buckweat replies, "Darla said my dictate funny".
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Postby chrisp » Sat Apr 17, 2010 10:39 am

A black woman has an abortion.

2 weeks Later she receives a cheque from crimestoppers.

2 sperm swimming one turns to the other and says "how far to the fallopian tubes cos i'm getting tired?"

"Ages yet we've only just passed the tonsils!!!!"
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Postby apc2010 » Mon May 17, 2010 11:23 pm

I've just finished my anti- homophobia course.............
I'm being entered for the exam..............
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Postby georgios100 » Mon May 17, 2010 11:41 pm

A friend of mine came to my BBQ party wearing a hawaiian shirt, full of flowers & palm leaves.

And I asked:

How often do you water your shirt?
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Postby apc2010 » Tue May 18, 2010 12:42 am

The difference between a blow job and anal sex ...................

One makes your whole day .....the other .................
makes your (w)hole weak.............
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Postby cyprusgrump » Wed May 19, 2010 9:29 pm

This new "in private" browsing mode in Internet Explorer is rubbish.

Everyone in the Internet Café can still see me wanking. :oops:
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Postby SKI-preo » Thu May 20, 2010 3:54 pm

What is worse than a Greasy wog?
Cum on Aussie( local joke)
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