Cyprus-Forum.com

[pumpernickle]

This is what I can't fathom out as I venture out into the mean streets of Larnaca after dark.

Endless fleets of dark, tinted Mercedes Benz motors creeping along at 20 km per hour, with moody, swarthy, shady gangsta wannabes at the wheel, giving it the large one through the window at passers by.

And where are they going and what are they doing?

Let's face it, they aint visiting their mums. But I bet they havent the bollocks to be selling no drugs neither.

So my theory is that these dodgy sh1t bags belong to either of these camps:

1) Pimp. They are pimps to the vast numbers of eastern european girls enslaved on the island for the purposes of illicit profit and material gain. I mean, let's be honest, Mercs don't come cheap, even on HP contracts. The men may be pussy arsed nobodies but you don't earn that wedge serving pints in the meeting pub.

2) Brother of Pimp. They are nobodies and add a big dolop of insignificance and nobody-ness. Their bros are dodge however, and can be found in alleys yanking women along by the hair and coercing them into serving their next trick. But he, however, is a pretender, and talks the talk while Snoop Doggin' along in his bro's ride, thinkin' he all that and a big bag of chips with the dips. Cock.

3) Wannabe pimp with rich dad: He owns the Merc, but only on daddy's dollar. So out comes the dated gangsta rap and the bon jovi greatest hits album, and let's see how much combustible fuel we can kiss the environment with in one night for absolutely no reason, while this asshole drives around and around in a circle (through the finegoudes) hour after hour. Greenpeace, what the f**k are you doing in the Sea of Japan looking for Whale Hunters. Get your arses to Larnaca pronto, we have a problem.

4) Mentally disturbed people who all happen to know eachother and have far too much money.
A strange and ad hoc category i'll grant you, but here this. These people arent always on their own. They drive in threes sometimes, and pull up outside beripteros and all get out like their the cast of Goodfellas or Reservoir Dogs. I look at them, and if it werent for the fact that this is Larnaca, I'd be forgiven for thinking their about the blow away the cashier, rip the cash register from behind the counter and nab a pack of Chipita Bake Rolls on the way out the front door.
So who the hell are they and what are they doing? Its late. So they arent business men, especially wearing the sort of clobber you'd get chucked out off a building site for back in britain for being so Pikey.

SO I ask forumers, who the hell are these random people who drive in convoys of Mercedes' looking all rough and tumble.

Is this a Cyprus thing, or am I losing the plot?

answers on a postle mc nostle maaa niggi, yo yeah....word to the mo-fo-ing street.

[jazzy1]

Hey Pumpernickle,

I am supposed to be moving to Cyprus just after summer this year, weighing up the pros and cons.....you make it sound awful.... prostitutes and pimps, dodgy characters and so on, it sounds just like here!!!!!

[andri_cy]

just think about this:
if it is that awful, why is pumpernickle still there?
Pumpernickle likes to turn every little thing into drama. I am sure there are some "pimps" but if it were that bad he/she would be on the way back to UK instead of sticking around whining.

[simonwjones]

Man o man

Whats you on about mate?

Yeah ok Cypriots are posers but not gangstas. These guys probably have rich Daddies to buy them new cars. There are some wealthy people around Cyprus you know.

There are posers where ever you go. These guys are probably chasing the ladies thats all. No guns, no drugs, no weapons nothing. Just lads on the town.

Chill man!

[andri_cy]

yep. sounds about right. They are harmless blokes that think they are hot....

[simonwjones]

Here here Andri_cy.

They just love the tourist girl!

[andri_cy]

lol isnt that the truth...

[jazzy1]

Pumpernickle why are you still there???? all you seem to do is moan about it????

[jazzy1]

Pumpernickle why are you still there???? all you seem to do is moan about it????

[Svetlana]

I think Pumpernickle tries to be controversial to get discussion going, so exagerates issues. At times, this can come across in a slightly irritating manner but I suspect he loves his life here but does want to highlight the shortcomings of life here.

Believe me, life is far from perfect here, but most other places are even less perfect! I think it is healthy that we do consider the less pleasant aspects of the island and have debate/a laugh about them.

Lana