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HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

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HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby miltiades » Tue Jan 29, 2019 12:57 pm

Been driving in Cyprus for 21 months now during which time I have formed an expert view on how to be a good Cypriot driver.
1. When pulling out DO NOT indicate.
2. DO NOT use indicators when making a turn.
3. In Cyprus we drive on the left but not when turning right where we drive on the right.
4. Red lights mean Stop if there is traffic if not ignore. Also crawl forward at red lights so that you will be ready to speed on at amber.
5. The use of mobile phones whilst driving is mandatory.
6. If carrying a child on the front seat do show the child how she or he can grow up and become a good driver by sitting the child on your lap, making sure you call your partner and let them know.
7.Speeding is compulsory especialy in town.
8. In heavy traffic make sure you do not allow any vehicle access on to the main road, its ....bad manners.
9.When negotiating a roundabout have your foot firmly on the accelerator and the break, and sound your horn if a driver in front is waiting when clear to go.
10.Follow as close as possible a car in front, more so on the highway.

All in all, my conclusion is that , we Cypriots are the .....best in Europe!!!
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby Maximus » Tue Jan 29, 2019 2:08 pm

Number 4 is my favorite but I am completely bewildered why those that do this stop in the center of the junction. They may as well keep on going because they already jumped the red light.

You also missed the other one at traffic lights.

11. when you want to turn and cross oncoming traffic at a traffic light junction, keep nudging into the lane of the oncoming traffic. Either they will keep swerving around you or you will eventually, completely obstruct their right of way so you can go instead.

I am grateful but somewhat surprised, that the insurance premiums for motorists are still extremely low in Cyprus.
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby Maximus » Tue Jan 29, 2019 2:18 pm

One more,

12. When parking next to another car, make sure the other driver cant get in their car without scratching the shit out of yours. If they are lucky, they might be able to get in from their passengers side without causing damage to the car two spaces along.
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby miltiades » Tue Jan 29, 2019 3:12 pm

Car Insurance premiums in Cyprus are indeed extremely low, or in the UK ALL Insurance companies are exorbitantly ecpensive. My 2.5 Jag is costing me a mere €217 euros, taking into account thst I produced evidence of my UK N.C.Bonus for maximum years, inspite of my ....youthful age. I have seen in my 21 months of driving countless trakkarismata, all senseless stupidities, its no wonder I consider the vast majority of Cypriot drivers as suitable to drive ONLY donkeys. Yet you hear on TV that the traffic authorities are concentrating on safety belt wearing. Re malakes, I shout, first teach the Cypriots what the little prick next to the steering wheel is meant to be.
The use of mobiles is done so casually as if compulsory. Im not that concerned with stupid parking as my life is not endangered but Im concerned when some Mullaj behind the wheel goes through tje red lights. By the way have you noticed how many young moullaes or fucking talliban Cyprus has ? They copy their Greek cousins with those dirty looking Islamic beards.
Apart from this I wouldn't change Cyprus for all the ....wine in France. Great country, Great people, the friendliest people on earth. Pretentiousness is something I have always detested so when in July last year I was invited to a BBQ , naturally I dressed in short trousers and a T-shirt. My cousin was not amused pointed to the swimming pool where all the ...plonkers were in suits and ties!! 38c and these fuckers were by the pool in fucking suits. I said I will go and change and made my exit.
Can't wait for Spring to come then our glorious summer !!
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby Londonrake » Tue Jan 29, 2019 3:25 pm

Not worthy of inclusion in the top 10, but one of my favourites:

Remember to stop at a periptero/bakery on the way home after darkness. Always choose one on the opposite side to your direction of travel. When you do so and pop out - just for a few minutes - make sure you leave your headlights on, in order to make blinded, oncoming drivers fully aware of your presence. :shock: 8) :lol:
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby Pyrpolizer » Tue Jan 29, 2019 7:30 pm

Milti is trying to convince us to take driving lessons from Charlies or British expats. No thank you. :lol: :lol:

http://youtu.be/kVCwQcT30gY?t=120

Oh just don't forget to use a mobile phone at 3:19. What's the problem?

And park on the wrong side of the street out of a periptero at 4:36. Nice!
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby miltiades » Tue Jan 29, 2019 7:46 pm

Pyrpolizer wrote:Milti is trying to convince us to take driving lessons from Charlies or British expats. No thank you. :lol: :lol:

http://youtu.be/kVCwQcT30gY?t=120

Oh just don't forget to use a mobile phone at 3:19. What's the problem?

In that case continue driving as if riding a fucking donkey. Cypriots are BAD drivers including you. Unless a Cypriot has had a lengthy driving experience in Europe, excluding Greece and Italy, they will always drive cars as if riding donkeys. The driving standards are only slightly, very slightly, higher than those of Arabs. In short, 90 plus % of drivers would fail a driving test in the UK. Why the Fuck do you have to crawl forward at the red lights you Plonkers. There is a fucking line by the lights, dont fucking cross it. Use the fucking indicators when pulling out. Fucking donkey riders.
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby Pyrpolizer » Tue Jan 29, 2019 7:55 pm

as for these guys who prefered to bring their own Jeep from the UK,
it seems it's perfectly OK in rural areas in the UK to drive on the left, center, or right side of the road at will.
See they have rules over there that we don't.
Give us a break man.

https://youtu.be/2POkDiWq7sY?t=472
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby miltiades » Tue Jan 29, 2019 8:12 pm

Pyrpolizer wrote:as for these guys who prefered to bring their own Jeep from the UK,
it seems it's perfectly OK in rural areas in the UK to drive on the left, center, or right side of the road at will.
See they have rules over there that we don't.
Give us a break man.

https://youtu.be/2POkDiWq7sY?t=472

Look here Plonker. I dont give a toss how driving in rural UK areas is. I do give a toss how the Cypriots drive here. It is abysmal, highly dangerous and fucking stupid. Im concerned at the total lack of road discipline, the stupid speed and utter disregard of other road users. We are not some tinpot African nation or some Arab country. Are you a Mullah by any chance, you sound like one. !!
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Re: HOW TO BE A " GOOD" CYPRIOT DRIVER

Postby Pyrpolizer » Tue Jan 29, 2019 8:22 pm

miltiades wrote:
Pyrpolizer wrote:Milti is trying to convince us to take driving lessons from Charlies or British expats. No thank you. :lol: :lol:

http://youtu.be/kVCwQcT30gY?t=120

Oh just don't forget to use a mobile phone at 3:19. What's the problem?

In that case continue driving as if riding a fucking donkey. Cypriots are BAD drivers including you. Unless a Cypriot has had a lengthy driving experience in Europe, excluding Greece and Italy, they will always drive cars as if riding donkeys. The driving standards are only slightly, very slightly, higher than those of Arabs. In short, 90 plus % of drivers would fail a driving test in the UK. Why the Fuck do you have to crawl forward at the red lights you Plonkers. There is a fucking line by the lights, dont fucking cross it. Use the fucking indicators when pulling out. Fucking donkey riders.


Nonsense. I lived and had my own car in an Arab Country.. It's all highways, hard to do any mistake.
I also lived in a rural area just a few Km away from the city in Europe. The law was different, in fact we could cross the junction at Red light assuming we would first stop, and make sure no one was coming from the other direction. The only striking difference was that you couldn't park at the wrong side of the street. As for how the people were driving, I really enjoyed watching young girls down the rural road, driving like rockets on their way to school in the mornings.
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